The Maynard Gang

Reflecting upon the signature sayings and utterances of my family and other noted Randolph County denizens, I decided to write them down lest they be forever lost. Truly, I am the only one left who knows this stuff. Perhaps the column will trigger similar memories in other families.

Quimby Seawel will lead off the presentation. A conscientious Church of Christ elder, he had an irreverent sense of humor and wit that he rarely let out publicly.

Asked to explain the Apostle Paul’s meaning of the phrase “certain lewd fellows of the baser sort,” he answered within the frames of reference of members of the Bible class. “It would be a bunch of fellers like you would see gathered up on the Attickey store porch.”

Listening to a speaker pontificating on a subject he obviously knew little about, he would observe “some people’s ignorance is a very refreshing thing.”

Like many back hills hunters of his generation, he saved and savored the heads of his squirrels. He and grandson Dean Swick had bagged three of the rodents that were “too old to fry.” My mother browned them in a skillet and pressure cooked them. He described the culinary experience in dining on the largest fox squirrel. “I took a big bite at the nape of that baby’s neck and didn’t get all the way to the bone.”



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