Opinion

I got nothin, annihilation, aught, blank, cipher, extinction, fly speck, insignificancy, naught, nihility, nobody, nonbeing, nonentity, not anything, nought, nullity, obliteration, oblivion, shutout, trifle, void, wind, zero, zilch, zip.

For my early birthday present, my husband bought us a brand new zero turn mower — emphasis on the “us” because nothing says “I love you” like 50-inch blades.

Ran into one of my old teachers at the post office. We hugged and chatted about school. I asked what she taught because I couldn’t remember. She said “Reading.” I thanked her for being my teacher and told her she taught me well, because I was decent with the words. Then she said “You know, I taught social studies too, maybe it was social studies?” Noooo... I’m pretty sure it was reading. She obviously hasn’t seen my “Branches of Government” cheat sheet above my desk. That is social studies, right?

Past few weeks everytime I try to text “Got”, it autocorrects to “Hot”. They know. They all know… A client of mine was telling her child I was a “Realtor”. The child misunderstood and asked “She’s a real turd?”